History : My First Born

I remember clearly the time I conceived my boy. I was really hoping to have a girl but the moment I was pregnant, people started predicting that I will have a boy! What a spoiler, and the major let down was when the gynae confirmed it was going to be a boy during the pre-natal visit when the fetus was only 12 weeks old! At that time I insist it’s still too early to confirm and still hope that the gynae could be wrong. However, following every visit from then on, she confirms it again and again that it’s going to be a boy. By that time, I began to accept the fact and try to psyche myself to be like happy about it, thinking it really doesn’t matter whether it’s going to be a boy or a girl, as long as it’s a healthy baby.

The pregnancy was not an easy one as I vomited everyday since the start of the pregnancy till the day of delivery at the labour ward! I threw up every morning and I cannot tolerate any place that’s stuffy, smelly and smoky. I remember one day after we had breakfast at a hawker centre, I was walking beside my hubby and there was a garbage truck right in front of us. My hubby said, “Oh no….” and before he could run away, I threw up on him, right on his arms! He screamed as he was going to have an important meeting later on and now he had to rush back to change!

I had elephant legs and my whole body swelled up like a balloon. The fact that I continued to work did not help the situation and I actually had a small contract to provide laundry services which worsen the swelling.

During the last two weeks to my expected date of delivery, I had to stop work as the swelling of my feet was really bad and I became really heavy. Friends whom I have not seen for a long time would not have recognized me as my face was practically disfigured, as my nose was enlarged grotesquely and my face puffed up like a ball!

My baby was overdue about a week. I began to feel contractions in the morning of 7 December 2000, around 5.30 a.m. I woke up and took a slow shower and washed my hair as I know I will not be washing my hair till I get back from the hospital. My mom reminded me to have a full breakfast as I don’t think I will be able to eat during labour and she said that I needed the energy for it!

We arrived at the hospital at 8.30a.m. My mom insisted that I was wheeled upstairs but really I could still walk as the contractions are really not giving me any serious pain yet. They immediately put me in the labour room and we waited till the gynae came to see me. She had to break my water bag. That’s when my nightmare begins. The pain intensified after that so I was given the pethidine a painkiller which actually helped me sleep till noon.

The contractions were becoming more frequent and I was already getting hysterical. Yes, hysterical as in screaming and calling for my mom. My mom was allowed in the labour room as she practically knew most of the key staff there and also the gynae of course. They were her ex colleagues. Yes, mom was a nurse and she advised against epidural which I stupidly agreed with her. The midwife made me inhale that stupid gas called Entonox which of course did not ease the pain but instead it made me threw up all over the place. (Thanks to my hearty breakfast and also I had another round of breakfast in the labour room). I could tell that the midwife who was cleaning me up was quite cross with me, but hey, I can’t help it. After that, she again attempted to make me inhale the gas again but I actually flung the instrument away. Both my hubby and mom was trying to pacify me to no avail.

By 5 p.m. I was still dilated at 8 cm only and baby’s heartbeat began to drop. Therefore, I was advised to be induced and which means it will be even more painful. At this point I screamed for epidural. Please!!!!!!!!!!!! Give me the epidural. I had reached a point where I told the midwife, “STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!! She was shocked and didn’t know how to react to me. I said I had enough; I do not want to continue. Yes it was stupid, but I was already not myself. Then one of the midwives held my hand and said that since I already suffered for so many hours, why not endure for a little while more but I was already close to being restrained and tied up like what they do to the mentally ill people!

Finally the midwife gave in and said she would look for the anesthetist who was actually finishing with one case in another labour room. He came round and agreed to handle my case, THANK GOD! He started to run through the procedure with me but I just cut him short and told him to just give me the jab la…Don’t waste time ok?? He was almost laughing but I was in so much pain, he quickly continued with preparing me for the jab. Gosh, just 10 minutes after the jab, it was like I went from Hell to Heaven! The feeling was just great. Just minutes after that I was fully dilated and here comes my first born, a whopping 3.87 kg boy with a full head of thick black hair. Here he is…isn’t he adorable???

(Photo coming soon…)

My mom actually took over the baby and actually gave him a whack on the buttocks and he let out a very faint cry. He was heavy alright as I could feel the heavy thud on my chest when I first held him.

Kieran was diagnosed with Torticollis (tightened muscle in the neck) a month after he was born. Even my mom had not heard of this condition before. We were observing him and found that he couldn’t turn his head to his left side. That was strange. My hubby felt a lump behind his left neck. We were recommended to this physiotherpist by the name of Mrs. Wong who runs a modest clinic at SS2, Petaling Jaya. She exclaimed at my son’s condition and wondered why the doctors did not find out about it at his first physical examination in the hospital. To think I had paid so much for one of the best private hospital in town, and one of the most expensive ones. The first time she twisted his neck, he turned blue! My maid burst into tears! Poor Kieran….Because of his extreme condition, he had to undergo physiotherapy every day of the week except for Sunday, which was her day of rest. We saw quite a number of babies and young toddlers coming to see Mrs. Wong too for the same condition. It went on for about 6 months and at that time Kieran started to cry the moment he saw Mrs. Wong! We stopped going shortly after that. Thank God for Mrs. Wong who charged really reasonably if not, can you imagine the cost for 6 days a week in 6 months!

(Photo coming soon…)

I actually had a pre labour pain experience a year ago, when I had a miscarriage. I lost the baby when it was only 8 weeks old (my mom reminds me that it’s not a baby, it’s only a fetus, to me it’s my baby). At that time my dad was still alive. He was suffering from cancer, and he actually looked forward to his first grandchild but unfortunately, he was not able to live long enough to enjoy that moment. This is the saddest part; I was very close to my dad. When I had the miscarriage, he was very angry, he scolded everyone in the family for not looking after me closely. It’s nobody’s fault. What was meant not to be, it’s meant not to be. I was not even sad when it happened, really. I really didn’t know how to feel. I was not prepared for the baby in the first place. My hubby was very sad though.

Well, even though it was a miscarriage, I had to go through the whole confinement month ritual, and that was when I put on so much weight and never lost it till my next pregnancy and even after my son was born.

I had to change my whole wardrobe which is really annoying. The change was good but the size was not! People around me began to comment about my weight and how I looked. It was embarrassing. Then I met someone who offered me a good package at a local gym. I began working daily and was really committed. The results became apparent after 3 months. My clothes were now hanging on me. I had to have them altered and of course gave me the excuse to buy new clothes!!!! The feeling was surely great as people began to compliment how I lost the excess baggage!